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Bossing Arbitrariness Power Games Bossing: 10 Tips for Difficult Superiors

Hierarchies are simply part of the everyday job. But what happens when the boss exerts his power too much, crosses boundaries, and soon becomes a dominant theme? And what can you do about it?

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Bossing: Threatening Instead of Discussing?

Without a doubt, a boss has power because he has influence on merit, career development and the work of his employees. Power in itself is not negative - bosses have a lot of responsibility.

But it is bad when supervisors use their power to assert their wishes, for instance by cooperating with them Warning, Termination, Transfer or denied boarding. Very few bosses are naturally evil. If a superior lets his power play, it is mostly because he no longer knows what to do. And threatening is faster than arguing.

Typical situations in the job

We all know typical job situations: The boss wants the employee to do more and work longer. Instead of simply saying that, he threatens, “I told you last week that you had to work harder. If you don't finally do that, you can forget about your promotion. This is an instruction. Take it seriously! ”What to do?

In the short term, the best option is to surrender and follow the instructions. If a threat is so offensively pronounced, an employee who contradicts it, in any case, pulls the short one. Who, however, always makes good, what the boss requires does not remain faithful to himself and runs the risk of being taken no longer seriously.

What to do when the boss lets the muscles play?

But resisting is not easy, because the consequences can be serious - and that scares you. It can help to question your fears in order to find out about them clear to become how far a boss can really go.

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For example, why am I exactly afraid? What can happen in the worst case if I react the way I want? How do I deal with it? And: is this worst case really that bad? One should also consider whether there were situations in which one was not afraid of the boss's power and what was different there. And how you would meet the boss if you were not afraid anymore.

Independent, but consistent

Such considerations help to determine the point to which you submit to the power of the boss - and where the limits are. For example, you can define for yourself: “I am ready to work longer in the evening in order to achieve the required workload.

But under no circumstances do I want to come to the company on the weekend. Because: “I would like a promotion, but not at any cost!” “In this way, you refuse to play the power game and to a certain extent make yourself independent of the power of the boss. But of course you have to be ready to live with the consequences.

10 Tips against Chef Willkür: How to get out of the game

If the boss threatens you, you should not go into it, but fight with appropriate rhetorical gimmicks. We show you how it works.

  1. Be constructive: Try to bring the conversation to a constructive level, by finding a compromise with objective arguments.
  2. Show your consequence: The boss threatens to resign. Neutralize the power of your superior: "I value my work very much, but if there was no other way I would leave the company."
  3. Compromise readiness: Propose a compromise: “So that there is no termination, I would like to come to a constructive solution with you. I therefore suggest that you work longer during the week, but I would like to have the weekends free. "
  4. Make the power play a topic of conversation: Bring the threats to a factual level: "We should stop arguing emotionally and start talking again on a factual level";
  5. Find alternatives: Suggest possible compromises and alternatives: “Is this how we want to deal with each other?” Or “I don't find it helpful at the moment if we only think about an all-or-nothing alternative, let us start the conversation again. I would like to discuss this topic with you constructively. "
  6. Show the consequences: Point out the consequences your boss's negative behavior has for you personally. Let us know what consequences it has for your work and what the behavior triggers you emotionally: "I cannot do my work in peace if you assign me a new task every hour."
  7. Say what you want me to do: Confess your feelings, wishes and observations and express them honestly: "I feel very pressured by you", "I am very dissatisfied that I now have to do this task under time pressure"; “I would like more help from you with this project” or “I'm through yours Criticism somewhat unsettled and cannot do my work in peace. "
  8. Speak in the I-form: Speak very consciously in the first person, do not hide behind an impersonal "man" or "we" - that seems more believable.
  9. Avoid accusations: Wrong: You messages like “You are irrelevant!” Have an accusatory effect and trigger resistance and barriers that impair the course of the conversation.
  10. Use questioning techniques: Ask open questions: "What do you propose?", "Which rules apply here?" Or "In your opinion, what does a good compromise look like?" In doing so, you signal a genuine interest in an objective agreement.

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5 responses to "boss arbitrary power games bossing: 10 tips for difficult superiors"

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