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Disclosure & Copyrights: Image material created as part of a free collaboration with Shutterstock. Text originally from: “Why thinking doesn’t want to get into our heads: Even more useful findings from everyday psychology” (2013), published by Heyne Verlag, reprinted with the kind permission of the publisher.
From Dr. Volker Kitz (More) • Professor Dr. Manuel Tusch (More) • Last updated on October 08.05.2023, XNUMX • First published on 02.10.2014/XNUMX/XNUMX • So far 8497 readers, 4840 social media shares Likes & Reviews (5 / 5) • Read & write comments
We should not and absolutely do not want to think about something - and that is precisely why we constantly think about it all the time. This is not only impractical when it comes to getting rid of annoying-cherished habits.
With the habits it would be harmless. For example, “Today I won't think about cigarettes all day!” or “Today I don’t keep staring at my sexy colleague’s back.” - if we do, the consequences are still relatively manageable.
Anyone who suffers from insomnia and keeps saying to himself in bed in the evening "Now I won't think about my sleep problem, I'll just go to sleep" - you will achieve exactly the opposite of that. This is pretty for sure.
But one also tries to treat tangible mental illnesses such as depression or anxiety disorders by breaking up previous thought patterns. But that only works to a limited extent.
Because the more you instill in the patient, “It's best not to think about XY”, the more powerfully this thought hovers in their unconscious - and at some point, the stronger its way into consciousness. With dire consequences.
The ironic processes, both small and large, have us firmly in their ironic Hand. So be careful when you Problems want to solve by “simply” suppressing a thought or action.
If you want to gain more mental control over yourself, you can use the following two insights for yourself: First, the “focused distraction” helps. Determine a certain thing from the start, which you always think of immediately when the “bad” thought arises.
Of course, the distracting thought should not come from the undesirable category: "Instead of black chocolate, I'm just thinking of white chocolate." It works better like this: Chocolate = Eiffel Tower. In this way you at least avoid more serious relapses.
For another, you can feel better mentally check, the more capacity in your Brain is currently free. If you want to change a trait, don't necessarily try it when your brain is otherwise particularly busy.
If you are particularly stressed at work, running in a marathon, or your partner or the jackhammer on the construction site next door just annoying, you risk not only that it will not work - so you would have nothing to lose.
You risk getting the exact opposite of what you want: ending up even more Internet surf the web, eat more peanut flips, get mad at your sister more often.
“It's not a good time to start dieting right now,” so it's not just an excuse. At least not always. However, if you find that it's never a good time for something you want to achieve, it can be worthwhile to start somewhere else:
At the stress sources, which at first glance do not really have anything to do with the property you want to get rid of. So we take the pressure out: Now think again of a purple cow. All day long.
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Dr. Volker Kitz is Spiegel-Best-selling author, psychologist and ex-lobbyist.Kitz studied law and psychology in Cologne and New York and worked, among other things, as a scientist at the Max Planck Institute, lawyer and lobbyist. Today he lives as a freelance author in Munich. He wrote articles for renowned media such as Frankfurter Allgemeine, Die Welt, Financial Times and Spiegel Online, as well as numerous specialist publications for scientific journals in Germany and abroad. His books appear in over ten languages and are regularly featured on the in Germany SPIEGEL-Best seller list. Volker Kitz is an internationally sought-after speaker on the subjects of his books. More information at kitz-tusch.com. All texts from Dr. Volker Kitz.
Dr. Manuel Tusch Professor at the Münster University of Applied Sciences and head of IfAP.Tusch studied psychology and adult education in Cologne and Amsterdam. He has a psychological practice in Cologne, heads the Institute for Applied Psychology (IfAP), which among other things offers coaching training, and Professor with a research focus on consulting / mediation / coaching in the social affairs department at Münster University of Applied Sciences. His main areas of work in the psychological jungle are coaching, mediation, supervision and talk therapy. More information at tusch-consulting.com. All texts from Professor Dr. Manuel Tusch.
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