Change habits, break patterns: embrace your inner child

In every life there are painful events from the past that affect our present and Future influence. And they usually happened to us very early on. How can these negativePattern change?

The negative patterns from childhood

As children, we formed a picture of ourselves through key emotional experiences. Matching that we have Strategies designed to be loved by parents. We paid for this with the child's pain, which was not allowed to develop according to its nature. These inhibiting experiences continue to be present in our adult lives. A situation reminds us of an unsettled one Konflikt from childhood, they appear in the form of negative thought patterns such as: "I don't belong", "I have to adapt", "I can't do it", "I'm worthless" or "Nobody loves me". The pain associated with it can still be so alive in an adult that he does not feel cared for and at home in his life.

But if we want to have a good life, it's time to deal with this phenomenon of coming to terms with the past, which falls under the popular Term »inner child« is known and arouses great interest. The first step is successful self-coaching. With field-tested Methods and Ask discover your inner child. You will experience new things, throw old things overboard, Lust get ready for change and appreciate psychologist CG Jung's remark: "It is the child who brings light into the darkness and carries it before him."

The willingness to self-coach

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Self-coaching takes time and the willingness to accept new ways of thinking. But also informality. Some questions will probably take you longer to answer. Maybe they come from a completely different place Perspektive, or they are different than you suspected. Don't break it too much Head. Then put everything aside and pursue your favorite pastime. If you're having trouble finding answers, don't let that make you feel bad. Rows that are left blank are sure to have one too Sinn.

Embracing your inner child already points to that Significance of feelings in your work with yourself. It's about grief and emotional work, about what you didn't get in childhood, about what can no longer be changed, but also about the fact that as an adult you are still stuck in the past. Allow yourself to feel these feelings, otherwise you will continue to feel insecure and burdened in many situations in your life feel. Without your emotional involvement, no self-coaching and therefore no change will succeed. Another important note: if you notice that you are reaching the limits of self-help, please seek professional support. You wouldn't think of that either Ideato cast a broken arm myself.

Introduction to the subject of the inner child

With a red head, the team leader insults his assistant in front of the assembled team. There is an embarrassed silence in the room, the assistant doesn't know what to answer. Hans is clearthat he is jeopardizing his reputation as team leader. Things aren't going any better in Franz and Susi's partnership. They just fight. Often they don't even remember what the occasion was. You are worn down and resigned and wonder if a divorce is the Solution were. These are just two examples that everyone knows from their own experience or has observed in others. But what actually happens when adults People get carried away into words and deeds that they later regret and that they nevertheless often repeat as if under compulsion? Many are then surprised themselves: That's not me at all, I don't know myself that way. We can understand these strange lapses better if we look at the different parts of our personality, including the inner child, our awareness give a gift. You will encounter the following parts in self-coaching:

1. The inner child - the part that you can discover

With the expression "inner child" connects the Psychology the sum of all experiences and experiences from our past. It is important to discover this child in you. Because the parts of the younger self (as the trauma therapist Luise Reddemann put it) were, are and will always remain an important part of our lives. Basically, the inner child is our natural selves, the core of our being. In terms of brain physiology, it is assigned to the right hemisphere. It stands for our emotional life, our intuition, wisdom, creativity. In contrast to the adult world, our child part represents our inner spaces and our inner life. Anticipate, wonder, marvel, fantasize, dream, think in pictures - all of this is part of his forms of expression. You will in our Welt experience has shown that they are not taken seriously or are even treated with rejection. But they have their own value in figuring out who we are and where we want to go.

2. The injured child - the part that you can heal

It is part of human life that as a child you also had to experience the pain of being hurt. The injured child can, however, have such a strong influence on the adult that the latter only feels like an adult outwardly and according to the years of life. Yet we have the ability to heal childhood injuries and empower the confident adult within us.

3. The divine child - the part that you can give much more leeway

For the psychologist CG Jung, the image of the inner child was an archetype, i.e. an unconscious mental image that every human being carries within them. It not only represents the helpless and abandoned child, but also the access to our original selves. CG Jung coined the term “divine child” for the many positive sides of the inner child, such as spontaneity, enthusiasm, amazement, curiosity, liveliness, creativity and also the ability to be completely in the present. If we want to lead our lives as originals and not as copies, we need them Energy and the creative spark of our divine child. It is best to familiarize yourself with this attractive child share right now:

As you with the divine child in Contact can come: Ask the child in you the following questions:

• What was your favorite book?
• What was your favorite movie?
• What was your favorite fairy tale?
• Who was your favorite hero?
• What fantasies did you have?
• What job did you want to do?
• What was your favorite thing to do?
• What are your favorite caregivers?
• What did you not want to play?
• What did you think was stupid?
• What did you avoid

4. The confident adult - the part that you can develop further

How do we imagine this part of us? In a good mood, always with a smile and a funny song on your lips, in a positive mood with a lot of sunshine in your heart? Such an imagination can be very relaxing and invigorating. In reality, the adult is located more in the left brain hemisphere. To him belong reason, Background and rationality. Being an adult means thinking, considering, to plan, analyze, provide for and act. Everything revolves around the outer and active world. On the other hand, there is absolutely nothing to say as long as the sphere of influence of the children's world finds its right to exist and both systems stimulate each other. In theory, the parts discussed can be separated, but in practice they flow together in a dynamic process and are mutually dependent. That is why they are not mentioned separately here.

Conclusion: self-love makes you happier than self-optimization

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As children we are taught many things. But the care of Self love is rarely on the educational program. Rather, we learn how to behave so that the parents enjoy us. You have to love yourself to earn, every child learns. Finally it's down to the shine in the Eyes of parents instructed to his Self worth gespiegelt see. Remains that

She shines, looks again and again into severe and reproachful eyes, finds it difficult to find one herself positive build relationship. The fact is, we'd rather take care of others than ourselves Mother You have to accept that you didn't get as much love as you needed. But whether you can gift yourself with love in the present is entirely up to you.

As adults, it is easier for us to spend time caring for others, doing a lot of work, or optimizing ourselves than loving ourselves. We often forget what we actually want or need ourselves and say sentences like: "I don't mind", "I don't care", "Do you help me decide", "I can do without". We pride ourselves on so much selflessness and fail to realize how little love we have left for ourselves. This learned lovelessness prevents you from becoming happy.

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