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By Tom Diesbrock (More) • Last updated on October 15.11.2023, XNUMX • First published on 24.09.2012/XNUMX/XNUMX • So far 6823 readers, 1810 social media shares Likes & Reviews (5 / 5) • Read & write comments
Fatalism can also save us from having to deal with uncomfortable changes. It is better to sit there like under a glass bell - that seems safer at the moment.
This type human reminds a little of a passenger on the Titanic. Motto: I know very well that my job makes me dissatisfied and maybe somebody is sick. Possibly that my life could be better and more complete. But who guarantees me that another job gives me just as much security? None! And so I'd rather not move.
Imagine, someone has been traveling for a while on a cruise ship, which is now unfortunately licked. Through a hole penetrates water - not much, but foolishly too much for the pumps. Most of the passengers have already settled in rescue boats.
But that someone refuses to disembark and points out that the ship has so far been a safe and comfortable place. What are the dangers in such a small boat on the ocean? The cruise ship has finally proven itself, and who knows if it will really go under! The tour operator will certainly ensure that help will come soon, he is convinced of that. So why take unnecessary risks?
An absurd story. Naturally. Who would ever act like that? Well, I know a lot People, who may not be clinging to sinking ships, but are clinging to jobs that will almost certainly be “their downfall” for the foreseeable future.
And just like our Crusader, they follow the “logic of safety primacy”. I have already described that the thought of change in most people Anxiety triggers. Apparently we automatically judge the unknown as dangerous at first.
This mechanism is also useful, to protect us from risking our lives carelessly, he ensures our security. Its natural counterpart is our pursuit of happiness, excitement, new experiences, and growth. Both are inherent in each of us - but who has the upper hand in us is very different from person to person.
For some, a low level of dissatisfaction and stagnation is enough to immediately start looking for new opportunities. His “internal security officer” will only intervene if the risks appear to him to be existential.
Another person needs much more pressure to change and suffering before they set out on their journey. And even then he is always careful to Solution with the seemingly least Risks to choose from - his security officer is always on the alert and often takes control.
Whether we tend to lean towards one side or the other depends on our experiences, personality and also on the topic in question: Because we may be in the privacy willing to take higher risks than im Job or the other way around. The more security-oriented we are, the more Stress means a possible change for us.
And a typical reflex for stress is the "deadlock reaction" (all living beings react to danger either with attack, flight or dead spots): It causes me to stop moving or orient myself, but only to stay where I am until the danger is over.
A rather archaic reaction, which of course does not necessarily meet the requirements of the situation. But our cerebrum likes to pretend to be in control (even if it's hardly involved in the stress response) and finds it fast many good arguments that explain to others and ourselves that we are doing the best possible and most sensible thing.
Even if we're riding a dead horse or our ship is going down... Stress also causes us to lose weight Status quo basically than rather for sure evaluate and tend to overestimate the dangers that a change could entail.
It is amazing how often I experience that people are afraid to do everything when faced with a career change verlieren and to end up on the street completely penniless - although they then rationally assess this risk as rather low on closer inspection.
This tendency to risk overruns may have helped our ancestors tens of thousands of years ago in survival. Avoiding deadly dangers was certainly more important than discovering something new.
However, today we are no longer threatened by so many deadly dangers – at least in our professional lives. Unfortunately, our Brain not yet adjusted to this “new” situation. No matter how we twist it, the search for new territory will always involve a certain degree of risk.
When I look, for fear, only to see a maximum of security in every situation, my radius of movement is very, very small. With so little inner freedom I will hardly be able to find a really new solution. Rather, I will find myself more frequently on sinking ships.
Of course, there are also people who are unfamiliar with security thinking and who like to take high risks if their lives are not monotonous and uniform. You would never wait that long until your horse is dead ...
How do you rate yourself? What role does security play for you when it comes to your professional life Reorientation goes? Could it also happen to you that you sit a little longer on a dead horse because it seems so safe to you?
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Tom Diesbrock is a psychologist, consultant, team developer and book author. Tom Diesbrock himself has had a winding career: starting with a medical degree, working on a music project and as a photo editor, he studied psychology and founded a practice for psychotherapy. Today he works in Hamburg as a coach and psychological consultant. One focus of his work is accompanying people in their professional reorientation. His book “Your horse is dead? Get off! " has been translated into several languages, his new book “Jetzt mal Butter bei die Fisch!” will be published in October. More information at tomdiesbrock.de All texts by Tom Diesbrock.
I'm very happy, coincidentally via Facebook Having stumbled across your page and I am now very much looking forward to further contributions.
Change is good - I'll just bookmark this website and come back regularly. Thanks for that.
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