Most of us have learned at home or at school that we should always let the other person finish. But no rule is without exception - and that is absolutely necessary.
- Small talk - a great thing?
- Small talk is an important part of everyday life
- When small talk gets ugly
- Why we find it so difficult to interrupt small talk
- It is absolutely necessary to interrupt unpleasant conversations!
- The problem with good parenting
- Find the right way to end unpleasant conversations
- You have to learn to interrupt
- Learn to finish
- The celebrity chef's trick: wait for the right moment
- Small talk without risk: irritating boldly
- The 10 best tips to end a conversation
- Conclusion: Do not wait for others to end the conversation
- Top books on the subject
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Small talk - a great thing?
Small talk is a social convention designed to break the ice and introduce you to others. It's important that Regulate of small talk and avoiding situations where you are the only speaker. If you're a speaker, you should learn when it's appropriate to take over the conversation (by Ask ask, make jokes, bring up a subject, etc.). If you do this, you increase the chances that the person you are talking to will be interested in you.
That's the theory. But times Hand straight to the heart: do you like small talk? Small talk is commonly considered a great way to break the ice and get to know someone. But beware: much more often it is the perfect way to engage in a conversation that ends up going nowhere. And that's exactly what you should avoid. For your own sake.
Small talk is a form of polite conversation, usually referred to as easy, superficial, insubstantial, meaningless and bad. For example, it has been proven that small talk activates the brain's reward center and that Peoplewho engage in small talk are more likely to make friends and form relationships.
No doubt small talk is an important part of everyday life, but we all know that it can get ugly if not managed well. Some people are unable to tell the difference between small talk and a real conversation, others are aware for sure, that they are not being heard, and still others think that everyone is just there to listen to them.
When small talk gets ugly
This mélange can make small talk quite tiresome, as it tends to be overly enthusiastic and over-informative. And let's be Honestly, when you are at a party or business meeting, it is not only annoying but also boring! Haha, sorry to burst your bubble.
In some parts of the World you can't walk down the street without being confronted with awkward small talk situations. You're just trying to go about your day minding your own business, and then you have to listen to someone's long, drawn out, annoying story about how something happened to them the other day. they have no Lust to listen and no desire to reply. But what if you could simply interrupt awkward small talk situations?
Why we find it so difficult to interrupt small talk
That would be nice. But there's a problem: small talk can get incredibly awkward, but stopping it can make it even harder. Small talk is, we are taught, necessary to make new friends, make professional connections, and ultimately be successful. That's exactly what makes it so difficult in the end, a situation, no matter how uncomfortable we may be feel, to interrupt.
There are many reasons for this: In fact, interrupting small talk is considered one of the most annoying things that can happen in a conversation. In a perfect world, you wouldn't have to interrupt someone to ask a question or make a comment, but unfortunately we don't live in a perfect world.
It is absolutely necessary to interrupt unpleasant conversations!
In reality, interrupting such unpleasant conversational situations is sometimes downright unavoidable. For example, because in some cases small talk seems forced, impersonal and unnatural and so neither for personal entertainment nor for professional advancement useful is. So it's perfectly legitimate to interrupt small talk among friends, co-workers, and even strangers in everyday social situations.
When you try to interact with someone, you often have to assume that someone will inevitably speak to you. Usually this is done in a very small, non-confrontational way, but it can also be a lot more intrusive. But the good news is: There are several ways to deal with it and avoid unwanted conversations.
The problem with good parenting
Unfortunately, as is so often the case, our good upbringing ways: When someone starts a conversation with you, it is considered rude to interrupt unless you are an authority figure or they are asking you a question. And small talk is also seen as something positive that helps to make friends, at least according to the prevailing social pattern.
Therefore it can happen that you are overwhelmed by the supposedly “pleasant” small talk fast find yourself in an awkward social situation where you don't know how to talk about the most important issues. For example, if you're at a party and get caught up in an awkward small talk situation, like an absolutely boring conversation about the weather or politics. As a result, you feel a little uncomfortable.
Find the right way to end unpleasant conversations
Small talk also contains certain things risks: It's extremely easy to unintentionally offend someone with the wrong words. It's even harder if you don't understand the societal norms for small talk, because it's entirely possible to make someone feel like they're being talked about or ignored when they're not.
The problem is that if you just sip your glass in silence, people will think you don't want to talk to them, and you'll feel even more uncomfortable. So what can you do when someone starts talking to you and you don't know how to stop the conversation?
You have to learn to interrupt
The answer: you can use some simple ones Tricks Use to end the conversation immediately and continue with the evening or situation in a comfortable way. If your good upbringing gets in the way, just think of the many people you would still be sitting at the table with today if you had always heeded this polite rule of letting others finish speaking.
So how do you interrupt awkward small talk situations? Because of course you don't become more consistent and better at waiting for the right moment and ending conversations overnight. If you with that Problems have to interrupt others, you are like many others: so you are in good spirits Society of those people who, a few years ago, would never have dared to interrupt their conversation partners. And who have trained this more or less painfully and laboriously.
Learn to finish
In this context, one quickly thinks of Plato, but this time in a modified form. The following quote has been handed down from the Greek:
Learn to listen and you will benefit even from those who talk nonsense.
This beautiful quote could be modified as follows:
Learn to break up and you won't get a headache from the stupid stuff some people talk about.
The celebrity chef's trick: wait for the right moment
Incidentally, the reference to the quote from Plato comes from Best of HR - Berufebilder.de® author and ARD presenter Thorsten Otto, or from his book "Finding the right words: A radio presenter explains how you can have good conversations with anyone at any time" (2016), published by Münchener Verlagsgruppe (MVG). Otto also wants other people with his book Courage to put an end to awkward conversations in a courageous manner. Therefore, using the example of the prominent chef Alfons Schuhbeck, Otto shows how to end Small Tals correctly:
Just think of the well-known star chef Alfons Schuhbeck. He had a very ingenious 'trick': he was a master at ending a conversation without making you feel like you were being left stupid. I've watched him do it several times er walks the fifty meters between his two restaurants in Munich in less than ten minutes, although he is regularly approached by around twenty people on the short journey. Nevertheless, he has a nice word for everyone, a pat on the back or at least an autograph and everyone is happy about a few seconds Attention from Schuhbeck. His secret probably lay in the fact that, despite the hurry, he liked to talk to people. With heart and mind, so to speak.[...] If I've learned to end a conversation in this way, then you can do it too, although I wish you that you − have the opportunity to exercise no matter what - never get into such an uncomfortable situation.”
Small talk without risk: irritating boldly
Because, according to Otto, above all powerful men have to be boldly irritated in order to silence them, because they are used to being listened to, not interrupted and certainly not contradicted. The consequence for Otto is: do exactly that, interrupt him, irritate him with cheeky questions, get him out of it Concept.
I find it interesting that Otto also explains several times in his book that he was not born to be a talker, but that he first learned these skills with great effort. Just beginning its Career the interruption of unpleasant conversations cost him quite an effort. But over time he has managed to overcome the instilled shyness and dare to interrupt the authorities among his guests and end a conversation when he thinks it's right as a moderator or simply because the broadcasting time is over.
The 10 best tips to end a conversation
An example showing how important it is to know how to use this conversationalBehavior be able to prevent, but at the same time not walk the fine line to being impolite. That's why we've compiled this list of the top 10 tips to make it easier to interrupt awkward small talk situations.
- If possible, consider how to end the conversation.
- Do not talk around the bush, be polite but honest when you end a conversation.
- Do not waste time on lusty conversations.
- You have it in hand when you end the conversation.
- Ask for your excuse and say you urgently want to talk to someone else in the room.
- A smile and a friendly "See you later" or "We'll keep in touch" will not make you angry.
- Pass your conversation partner on to the next acquaintance (the reverse “clapping”).
- Practice in the high art of the final pointe.
- Stressful profile neurotics irritate you with cheeky questions. Better to end with terror ...
- But remember, you often see yourself twice in your life, and regardless of how it went, you should be able to look into your eyes the next time.
Conclusion: Do not wait for others to end the conversation
So you have now learned: Don't wait for other people to end the conversation for you. Because then you may wait in vain, especially when you are confronted with egomaniacs, profile neurotics or other constant talkers.
Simply end the conversation you don't like, politely but firmly on your own. It only takes courage self-confidence and a little determination. Have the courage, your well-being will thank you!
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