Communication is always and everywhere. Demanding conversation situations are one thing. However, ninety percent of business life is unspectacular normality. The success takes place in the allegedly banal, where often little time remains, to leave a good impression.

speed Dating

Part information: The milieu as a defining factor

In any form of Communication content is conveyed - articulated through the spoken word - in passing, on the phone, on a trip together, etc. And no different than in a lecture or a Presentation makes this mostly effortlessly formulated Information only a fraction of what the conversation partner gets. Other influencing factors take care of the “rest”:

The milieu is the defining factor. Where is the communication taking place? At a sales fair, at the research lab, at the construction site? With their often hidden codes, milieufaktoren create an aura of belonging.

Seller have their own language, regardless of industry and company, managers have them, as do caretakers, controllers or IT-specialists. They all use “their” language. Statements such as "typical executive floor", "typical IT person" or "typical salesperson" underline that there are language variants that are specific to the job or the milieu of the company and which change over time clear have further developed.

The role as an established element

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Our language varies depending on who we are in dialogue with, i.e. what role we are currently taking on. Every communication is established with the role finding. At a Conversation with the regular customers the role is different than when talking to them Executive.

Everyday dialogues arise from regulated role models fast. If the roles are unclear or have to be developed first, this will initially cost money Energy. Who is who? What role is intended for me? Am I “just the representative” or “the competent advisor”?

Speed ​​dating rules for effective communication

That's why speed dating is so interesting. But what does speed dating have to do with communication? As many conversation partners as possible should get to know a little more within a relatively short, fixed time.

These principles, which are known from the search for a partner, also apply when looking for a job, for the reunification of employees and for the job Company, to get to know the participants in seminars or for a professional exchange at trade fairs. They form an excellent basis for our everyday communication. Because it quickly becomes clear that every relationship is communication and every communication relationship.

Keep calm

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The first rule of speed dating is to be "easygoing." The latch in Head “I have to achieve that” is more of a blockade than a motivating one Objective. The here and now is important. Focus on what is happening right now!

It's not about difficult negotiations, but about the many discussions during the day. If the inner attitude is right, it works. If we think bad things about a situation or someone opposite, it comes across that way. On the other hand, those whoconstructive sees, she can also take it easy.

Confident occur

"Are you even listening to me?" – a question that everyone has probably heard before. Everyday things run the risk of being done “just by the way”. The 'short' conversation with the boss, the colleague, the customers or the employee is managed content-focused in the best case. Short, concise, clear - that's how we learned it.

But what is said only really comes across when it is expressed with the greatest possible presence. That demands trust to oneself, which characterizes our performances on a small scale. This “confidence” has nothing to do with arrogance. It's the confidence in yourself to know that I'm so well endowed with talents and skills to say and do the right things at the right time.

Stay open

Prejudice limits. If we meet someone who visually reminds us of someone, it's either negative or positive further. No matter what was, it shapes. But everyone has a chance not to be exactly what we expect.

So let us look at differences or look for things that are new, interesting, exciting. If you want to know something, then ask a question. If you want to say something, then say it. The other can not read thoughts.

Interested in the other

As banal as it is simple and doubly difficult: listening is a supreme discipline in communication. Take a look at how often People not listening. A colleague is talking about the holiday.

The others are not really interested in what he says and prefer to share their own story. If two talk, this is far from being a dialogue. Very often, so-called double monologues - both tell their story alternately. As a reminder: If we are really interested in our counterpart, we will be richer!

Being friendly costs nothing

“Put on your friendly face, show your joy at meeting someone. You win as authentic positive person more”. That's what the "Guide to Data" says. Let's imagine the conversation at the dating table starts with the words “Hello, I'm Peter.

I had a difficult youth, at the moment I don't have one Money and my boss breaks me." Honesty with all due respect... but we don't win flowers that way! Without an inner, positive attitude, we are neither in the date nor in the Everyday life really successfully. Positive behaviors are followed by a positive Resonance amplified, which in turn makes it easier to be friendly and trusting.

Start with a nice word

With all interest, presence, looseness, etc. - at some point we start to talk. A good reason to be charming and innocuous from the start. Only in the course of the conversation will we get to know our counterpart a little better.

That's why experienced speed daters recommend: Start with praise. Everyone likes to hear something positive. Let us create this microcosm of the constructive aura and by starting a positive conversation. "You wear beautiful glasses!" or "Thank you for leaving the place to me."

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