Hierarchies are part of the job Everyday life easy to. But what happens when the boss uses his power a little too much, crosses borders and power games soon become the dominant topic? And what can you do about it?

chef-play makes

Bossing: Threatening Instead of Discussing?

Without a doubt: A boss has power because he influences his earnings, professional development opportunities and work Employees. Power in itself is not negative – Bosses also have a lot of responsibility.

But it is bad when superiors use their power to enforce their wishes, for example by threatening to warn, denounce, transfer or deny boarding. The few bosses are by nature evil. When a supervisor lets his power play, it's mostly because he does not know anymore. And threatening is just faster than discussing.

Typical situations in the job

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We know all the typical situations in the job: The boss wants the employee to do more and work longer. Instead of just saying that, he threatens: “I already told you last week that you have to make more efforts. If you don't finally do that, you can forget about your promotion. This is a service instruction. Take it seriously! ” What to do?

In the short term, the best option is to surrender and follow the instructions. If a threat is so offensively pronounced, an employee who contradicts it, in any case, pulls the short one. Who, however, always makes good, what the boss requires does not remain faithful to himself and runs the risk of being taken no longer seriously.

What to do when the boss lets the muscles play?

But resisting is not easy, because the consequences can be serious - and that makes it Anxiety. It can help to question your fears in order to find out about them clear to become how far a boss can really go.

For example, why am I exactly afraid? What can happen in the worst case if I react the way I want? How do I deal with it? And: is this worst case really that bad? One should also consider whether there were situations in which one was not afraid of the boss's power and what was different there. And how you would meet the boss if you were not afraid anymore.

Independent, but consistent

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Such considerations help to determine up to which punk one submits to the power of the boss - and where the limits are. For example, you can define for yourself: “I am willing to work longer in the evenings to achieve the required workload.

But under no circumstances do I want to go to the weekend Company come. Because: “I would like a promotion, but not at any price!” In this way one refuses to play the power game and makes oneself independent of the power of the boss to a certain extent. But of course you have to be willing to live with the consequences.

10 Tips against Chef Willkür: How to get out of the game

If the boss threatens you, you should not go into it, but fight with appropriate rhetorical gimmicks. We show you how it works.

  1. Be constructive: Try to bring the conversation to a constructive level and continue it by finding a compromise together with factual arguments.
  2. Show your consequence: The boss threatens to fire him. Neutralize the power of your manager: “I value my work very much, but if I had to, I would leave the company.”
  3. Compromise readiness: Suggest a compromise: “So that there is no termination, I would like to come to a constructive solution with you here. So I suggest you work longer hours during the week, but I would like to have the weekends off for that.”
  4. Make the power play a topic of conversation: Bring the threats down to a factual level: "We should stop arguing emotionally and start talking again on a factual level."
  5. Find alternatives: Suggest possible compromises and alternatives: “Is this how we want to treat each other?” or “I don't think it's helpful right now if we just think about an all-or-nothing alternative, let's get back to the conversation. I would like to discuss this issue with you constructively.”
  6. Show the consequences: Show the consequences that the negative behavior of your boss has for you personally. Share the consequences of this for your work and what emotionally triggers your behavior: "I cannot do my job in peace if you assign me a new task every hour."
  7. Say what you want me to do: Confess your feelings, wishes and observations and speak them out honestly: “I feel very pressured by you”, “I am quite dissatisfied that I now have to do this task under time pressure”; "I would like more help from you on this project" or "I am somewhat unsettled by your criticism and cannot carry out my work in peace."
  8. Speak in the I-form: Speak very deliberately in the first person form, do not hide behind an impersonal “man” or “we” - that looks more credible.
  9. Avoid accusations: Wrong: You messages like "But you are irrelevant!" are accusatory and trigger resistance and barriers that impair the flow of the conversation.
  10. Use questioning techniques: Ask open questions: "What do you suggest?", "What rules apply here?" or “What do you think is a good compromise?” By doing so, you are signaling an honest interest in a factual agreement.


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