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By Simone Janson (More) • Last updated on October 24.01.2023, XNUMX • First published on 03.06.2019/XNUMX/XNUMX • So far 4219 readers, 1553 social media shares Likes & Reviews (5 / 5) • Read & write comments
Communication is considered a panacea in conflict situations in Team. What is often overlooked: it does not always lead to Objective, because talking is not a panacea in conflicts.
Constant arguments with always the same ones People on the same topic over and over again strains the nerves of everyone involved and harms the productivity of a team. So at some point you ask yourself: What can you do about it - or to improve communication?
What I noticed recently: We write at Best of HR - Berufebilder.de® constantly about how to motivate, convince and help people to be more productive - with the right communication tools, for example. We provide tips on how to be better understood, how to delegate work instructions correctly and how to let others know, for example, of your own in conflict situations Opinions can convince.
There is one thing we like to ignore with all the great tips: sometimes the best communicationTricks simply wasted love's effort. Simply because the addressee of our efforts is fundamentally too far removed from our own point of view and does not understand us at all can, Or understands us, but simply does not follow our view will, One of our readers recently put it in a nutshell:
“In general, unfortunately, what matters is not what you say, but what others (sometimes unconsciously) interpret into it. It is of little use to speak correctly, no matter how formally. One of my favorite Max Frisch quotes is: 'Human language is unique, but not clearly. Any attempt to communicate can only succeed with the goodwill of others.'”
If one follows the speech act theory, for example, misunderstandings are largely based on communicative problems. Roman Jakobson defines transmitter and receiver in his model.
In between lies language as a medium. Not everything that the sender says is understood by the receiver exactly as the sender meant it. That depends, among other things, on the context, the selected channel and finally the code in which the message is transmitted. Or put more simply:
In order to avoid linguistic misunderstandings, it is necessary to adapt the medium in such a way that the recipient also understands the sender – for example with all sorts of rhetorical tricks. That's the theory. A Problem now consists in the fact that one should know the basic values of the other person in order to adapt the communication.
Unfortunately, this is often not possible, especially in a professional context. But even if we succeed, the communication with some people remains problematic: namely, those people with whom, despite everything, we do not come to a green branch because their basic attitudes, goals and motivations deviate too much from our own.
There is hardly anything more unproductive than constant arguments with such people. Unfortunately, however, quite a few fall into the misconception that any problem can be solved through communication. An example is the manager who Employees wants to convince of his decisions.
But not only that; the employee should be enthusiastic and motivated to support them, no matter how unpopular they may be. Since the Executive in the position of power is located, the employee does not even have the opportunity to express his or her own opinion. In any case, he will be dissatisfied with it Conversation going out.
Nevertheless, many are of the opinion that they can resolve such fundamental imbalances through discussions, negotiations, mediation, appraisal interviews, Meetings and the like - that's a mistake. And a downright time-consuming and unproductive one at that.
My conclusion from such experiences: True to the motto "Take it, Change it or leave it” one should, if it turns out that discussions are not fruitful, stop them.
A separation is the most time-saving variant in such cases. And the most annoying too. Not always communication can improve a situation too. It is just not the always praised panacea in case of conflict.
Not always both sides are willing to really, really improve their communication. And in fact: Only if this condition is fulfilled at all, a conversation in the end may not work well.
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Simone Janson is publisher, Consultant and one of the 10 most important German bloggers Blogger Relevance Index. She is also head of the Institute's job pictures Yourweb, with which she donates money for sustainable projects. According to ZEIT owns her trademarked blog Best of HR – Berufebilder.de® to the most important blogs for careers, professions and the world of work. More about her im Career. All texts by Simone Janson.
But talking always helps!
Hey, totally exciting approach. You do not always have to fight. Thanks for that!
Professionals know: One of the basic rules in communication is: Everyone who is involved in the conflict has joint responsibility for this conflict. Therefore communication (verbal and non-verbal and emotional) cannot be explained causally and logically. Blame is not possible - everyone has given their contribution that it is the way it is. It takes a “neutral” person, who is not part of the conflict, in order to bring about a clarification if you can no longer make any progress yourself. Repression and “making away” is definitely not a solution - the conflict then plunges into the subconscious; one then speaks of “cold” conflicts and appears subtle. That does not make it better" ;-)
Dear Mrs. Hannover, thank you for your comment. Of course, you are right. Sometimes it helps to gain a little distance and get professional help.
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