- Questions as an elegant form of rhetoric
- Closed vs. open questions
- Each argument is vulnerable
- Means against counter questions
- Playing with language
- Method for the ego
- Risks and side effects
- Like in the Space Zoo
- An attack says a lot about the attacker
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Questions as an elegant form of rhetoric
The question as a rhetorical form has been known as the ›Queen of the rhetoric< designated. True Masters were not those who could answer, but those who asked magnificently and made an answer almost impossible.
Questions trigger the now familiar response reflex in the other and force him to do the work himself that he was about to charge us. Really artful questions are factual, constructive - and short.
Closed vs. open questions
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If the correct answer to a question is rather 'yes' or 'no', we are talking about closed questions. Open questions, on the other hand, require detailed answers and usually begin with W question words: who, how, when, what, where, what ... Statistically, 90 percent of all questions are closed. Only 10 percent are open questions and thus the favorites of the really elegant quick-witted questioners!
- "You have no experience at all!"
- “Are you serious?” Would be a closed question that hits the questioner like a boomerang: “Yes, of course!”
- Instead, ask openly: "Which knowledge do you think I lack exactly?"
In order to be able to answer this open question, your counterpart has to think about it and switch from emotion to logic. They interrupted and redirected his impulse! While he thinks, you can take a deep breath and your next steps to plan.
Each argument is vulnerable
Every argument is vulnerable and can be questioned:
- “What exactly do you mean / speak against XY…?”
- “What exactly do you mean by…?”
- "What are you comparing to ...?"
- "What should be done so that YX does not apply?"
- "What should I do, change ...?"
- "What is it for you ...?"
- "What do you understand under…?"
Questions take the other seriously. This can go so far that they become uncomfortable for him and he has to realize that his objections are neither Hand still have foot.
We recommend asking questions as a quick-witted method, especially for introverts People. In any case, one of their typical characteristics is that they question everything and think it through thoroughly. questions good to forms is much easier for them than for extroverted characters. Using the 'Ask' method, you can get out of their apparent weakness make a wonderful strength.
Means against counter questions
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If your opponent also uses counter-questions, cover his Strategy for your own protection best on:
- "What would you have done in my situation?"
- "That's not what it is about!"
Reasonable responses to the statement:
- "I asked first!" can be:
- "I'll be happy to tell you after you've answered my question."
- “I would like to answer your question. And please be kind enough to tell me what you're getting at. ”
- "To be able to answer your question correctly, I need additional information."
Pay particular attention to generalizations and comparisons unrelated like: always, never, all, none, better, worse. In such a case ask, for example:
- “Worse compared to what for?”
Sometimes you get the answer:
- "That is a difficult question."
Playing with language
Be careful not to repair. But remember this mechanism for your counterpart. Then wait patiently for an answer. Your counterpart may have convictions, which are really worth it.
›The Other Side‹ and the ones that follow Methods ›Playing with language‹ and ›agreeing‹ each work in two directions. They affect others, but they are also particularly good for us. They strengthen their own ego and do Fun. Sometimes too much though!
Method for the ego
“The advantage of cleverness is that you can pretend to be stupid. The opposite is more difficult."
said Kurt Tucholsky (1890 - 1935), German journalist and writer.
Precisely because you would probably like to have more of it, please use this method carefully! It's best even for them Communicationwhen you first use these methods internally to practice, so that they are available to you as patterns of thought and action. However, they only actually use them in an absolute emergency and then pronounce them.
Risks and side effects
The beauty of all ten quick-wittedness methods is that they almost always work on us too. If we have a good answer im Style of models 6 to 8 comes to mind, then inside we feel even less like victims. Rather, we warm up mentally and can thus better find our way back to the factual level in dialogue with Method 5: Questions.
So with methods 6 to 8, please always remember first that this type of resistance is funny for us, but it is very likely to create bad feelings in the other person. Just in Conversation with customers or your own Executive is this rarely helpful in the result.
And now to the quick wit method ›The other side…‹
Like in the Space Zoo
Years ago, a short story about a space zoo, a large space ship that travels from one planet to another, as before, the wandering circus appeared from city to city. On each planet, the space ship folds away the outer shell, and the inhabitants can look at the animals of foreign planets behind glass for an appropriate fee.
On departure, the captain then reveals to his passengers the next destination. It turns out that the animals of the space shuttle are passengers of a planetary tour. In order not to get any foreign infections, they look from the space ship the other surroundings through the armored, transparent walls of their luxury apartments. - A very nice example for the other side. The laughing third is the travel agent, who can pay off both the visitors and the visitors.
An attack says a lot about the attacker
The main problem with attacks is that we relate what the other person says to ourselves, making us feel bad or insulted are. But who decides that you were actually attacked? Perhaps the statement of your interlocutor referred to himself and his very personal Problem...
Im Sinn With an elegant repartee, we no longer have to relate a statement to ourselves, but can leave it with our counterpart. Or we change the reference and the framework. The important thing is that we act appropriately, rather than through that Objective shoot out. Let us always strive for a cultivated form of verbal encounter after we have decided that the method ›The other side‹ is also appropriate for the current situation:
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