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Dealing with disputes Clarifying guilty questions: 12 tips on black peter syndrome

According to studies, around 15 percent of working time in Germany is spent dealing with conflicts. How can you argue better or conflicts avoid completely?

conflict-contentious

Arguments and conflicts at work: who is to blame

Again with the Manager or rattled his colleagues? Quick you have the other pushed the buck. But are the others always to blame when things are not going so well?

Bad working atmosphere, annoying colleagues, bad boss, tasks that are too boring or too stressful: There are many reasons why employees don't like their job. It is often the work circumstances that are to blame. Sometimes, however, the employee makes life difficult for himself with his attitude.

15 percent of working time for conflicts

Studies show that around 15 percent of working time in Germany is spent dealing with conflicts. Time that is better spent on productive work. But it's not always the fault of the dear colleagues or the lousy boss, sometimes it would be enough to just take a small step towards others.

It starts with the small things. Quite a few employees stand in their own way by generalizing bad experiences: “The colleague is always so unfriendly!” “The food in the canteen is always bad!” Or “I have one Error made - I am completely incapable! ”- these are sentences that many people probably think several times a day.

How you stand in your way

But instead of saying to yourself: “Well, the colleague who didn't say hello twice, just has a bad day a few times”, the generalization turns the colleague into an unfriendly bitch. In this way, prejudices quickly settle in people's minds: For example, when you are nice gestures the always unfriendly colleague no longer notices and firmly believes in what one is telling oneself in this way. Arguments and Streit are so preprogrammed, missing Motivation and bad mood the result.

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Chronic anti-behavior

In some people, this is usually a chronic one - and refers to the entire workplace: employees who are about to start working too hard after the recruitment, or the many new things they are supposed to learn. Or over long distances, high nervous stress, overtime or simply over stress. There are quite good bosses, who give even difficult employees a chance and for example, a longer consent phase. This does not help if the employees give themselves no chance

To circumvent such homemade problems is only to check your own expectations and to consider things a bit more differently. And with some practice, this can also succeed.

12 Tip for better quarreling

  1. No generalized vocabulary! Do you often find words like "never" or "always" in your vocabulary? Avoid such vocabulary in thinking and speaking - the first step towards a more nuanced perspective
  2. Consider each event individually: Just because the colleague did not greet you yesterday and today, she does not always have to do that. Maybe she was just stressed?
  3. Examine Expectations: Do not you expect a thing like that? Check if they do not already have prejudices.
  4. Change Settings: Some things you can not change. With a positive attitude to the matter, however, much is easier.
  5. Do not categorize: Especially when getting to know new people, we like to put them in drawers. Take a closer look and review your initial assessment, if necessary.
  6. Split problem into single problems: Often one sees one, because one generalizes, only a large problem mountain. Solve problems in small individual problems that will solve you step by step.
  7. To stay objective: In conflicts with the supervisor, it is particularly important to remain objective and objective, even if the boss does not meet the employee with the same professionalism.
  8. Patience and self-control: Emotions disturb judgment and provoke heated discussions. Employees should make a big difference.
  9. No know-it-alls! Of course, it's always easy to say that you can do it better yourself. Maybe the job requires the boss but much more than you perceive as an outsider.
  10. Understanding for the boss: Perhaps the boss has more to do than he can manage. Try to show understanding.
  11. Support the boss: Offer your help: Perhaps the boss has less experience in some areas and is grateful for help and support.
  12. To face the challenge: Employees should take every opportunity to prove that they are capable of coping with major challenges and taking responsibility. This gives pluses.

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3 responses to "Arguing, conflicting, clarifying the question of guilt: 12 tips for black peter syndrome"

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